Your Guide

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Nancy Shanteau

Nancy Shanteau (she/her) is the lineage bearer for Skills for Change Coaching. She is a Master Somatic Coach and the founder of the Folkloom School, the home of the Skills for Change Coaching Certification Program. A settler who lives and works in Nevada County, CA, unceded Nisenan land, Nancy practices Relationship Anarchy and Solo Polyamory, identifies as pansexual and aromantic, and is a white multi-ethnic, non-binary woman. Dedicated to radical, empowering education, Nancy has been teaching and coaching since 2004. “I believe people need safety and a feeling of connection and love in order to change. In a good teaching relationship, the teacher becomes engaged in your dream, and provides support, strength and vision to help you achieve it.”

Questions? Comments? Email me!

About this course

I want to live in a world where our efforts to communicate create connection and feelings of being loved, heard and understood. I want us to feel confident when we speak our truth, and I want others to feel safe being vulnerable with us. I want our conversations to support us to successfully co-create our dreams in partnership and in community. I want our words to build trust, so that our conflicts help us grow stronger together

I’m saddened when I hear from people who feel frustrated when their attempts to communicate instead result in disconnection, heartbreak and isolation. So often, when we finally share our feelings, we have waited too long, and what we say often reflects our fear, anger and desperation more than our positive desires. When these patterns of hurt and fear turn into disagreements and arguments, often we end up speaking from our survival reflexes and beliefs, rather than from our vulnerability, life-affirming values and optimism for the future.

I want for all of us to experience communication that helps us share our feelings, cooperate and grow so that we feel close, connected, and supported. We can learn to be accountable for our impact, repair successfully, and when necessary embody empowered boundaries.

I’ve created a 35-hour Practitioner Certification Program to share Skills for Change Cooperative Communication tools and methods — to help you guide others as they self regulate, express their vulnerability, build trust, shift from defensiveness to curiosity, and skillfully communicate beyond conflict.

  1. In order to communicate successfully, we need to know when to talk and when to pause. We'll begin with tools to help clients regulate emotions, center themselves and de-sensitize anxiety. We'll identify when a client has entered a flooded fight-flight-freeze-dissociate state, and help them make a recovery plan that restores their baseline resourceful state.
  2. We’ll explore how power affects transactions, and how to identify when cooperation is possible. We'll help our clients locate themselves in their wise adult consciousness so their communication is calm and effective.
  3. Our obstacles to cooperation often lie in our internalized oppressive beliefs. We'll learn to help our clients shift from defensiveness to curiosity.
  4. Compassionate listening starts with ourselves. We'll learn to help clients forgive themselves, embody empowered boundaries, and let go when needed.
  5. Finally, we'll explore the steps involved in building a successful Cooperative Communication practice. You'll leave with a clear plan for how to get started.

Your learning experience will be supported with a weekly interactive Q&A and practice session, videos, and Action Learning Steps. Every other week, you will meet with your Learning Pod to explore how you can build your practice and bring Cooperative Communication to your community. The book Access to Power, A Radical Approach for Changing Your Life will support your learning during the course and can be purchased at

I'm a very responsive and flexible teacher. I’ve coached and taught hundreds of people to build loving, supportive and powerful relationships. I use these communication tools in my own life. I know what works and what doesn't, and I want to share with you the peacefulness that comes from knowing how to speak your truth and listen with compassion to other people's vulnerability.

If you would like to enroll, click here

Each week, I'll release the videos for the current modules. Each video will lead to an Action Learning Step that will support your practice and embodiment of the materials. For example in the first module, we’ll learn methods for de-sensitizing anxiety, centering and self regulation.

Module 1) Introduction to Cooperative Communication: Self Regulation; the Clearing Held Feelings & Stories Process; Observable Facts.
Module 2) Empowered Transactions: The Hierarchy-Intimacy Spectrum; Wise Adult Consciousness; Story-Free Feelings.
Module 3) The Stories We Tell: Dismantle Internalized Oppression; From Self-Centric to Other-Centric Stories.
Module 4) Big Picture Stories: Compassionate Listening; Social Context; Validate, Nurture & Contextualize.
Module 5) Ask for 100% of What You Want: Share Your Vulnerability; Non-Generative Responses to Conflict.
Module 6) Cooperative Agreements: Negotiate Alternatives to Compromise; Empowered Boundaries; Self Forgiveness and Letting Go.
Module 7) Putting It Together: Make a Plan; Build Your Practice.

It all begins on May 31, 2021. Our first two-hour weekly practice call will take place on Thursday, June 3 at 4 pm PT.

A payment plan of $300 for six months is available.

Click here to enroll.

"Nancy has been one of the most significant mentors of my life. Her ability to inspire you to stand in your power and teach complex concepts is phenomenal..." Torin Lee, Skills for Change Coach and Communications Consultant

Equity Access Pricing Available Upon Request.

If you are interested in taking the course, enroll here. Sign up for an Empowerment Session to determine if the Cooperative Communication Practitioner Certification Program is the right choice for you. I am excited to get to know you and support you to offer Cooperative Communication Tools to your community.